Coke and the Big Fuk you

the dog spilled my coke so 
had to go get another one
lol
I take soda very seriously.  He does it all the time you’d thnk I would learn by now.  My mom and I have been arguing lately.  she said i didn’t pull my load around around place..she is at work all day and i help grandma do everything.  so she resorted to cursing at me “Goddammit Valerie” “Goddammit mom” “Fuck” “Fuck back at you” that was a piece of our back and forth conversation. blah..we made up tho.

Shit With The Kill

I just had 2 energy drinks with my medicine and I feel like taking the dog for a walk.  only my moms dog, there are 4 dogs in this house.  I love my moms dog and my deaf pup, but the other ones aren’t trained and piss and shit all over.  I need out of this place.  It’s nice to stay since our home was taken from us, and I don't mean to diss my grandma but the damn dogs need training.

Other than that everything is cool,  I stepped in shit this morning so that was fun.  I see my shrink at 3:30 so I have to pick my mom up @ 3:00 and rush to get to my appointment.

Jared Leto is so freaking hot.  I want everyone;ne to check out 30 seconds to mars and watch their the Kill video..it won an mtv award as best video of the year.  it’s really awesome, they based it off of the movie and Stephen king book the shining. 

brored in the whore house

I’m bored as hell.  Just sitting her  typing about.  I wish I had my own computer.  it has all of my art and poems on it.  it is stored at my brothers house until we can move out of grandmas house.  it’s not an easy situation but at least there is a place to stay and grandma is good about sharing her house with us.  I cook,  beleive it or not I’m a great cook. ok fuck it, I’m setting myself up with getting out of the house tonight.

Baldies and their admirers

Check out my new group and join if your up to it

Current web address: http://groups.google.com/group/bald-women Current email address: bald-women@googlegroups.com

Wuss and the crying game

ok, I’m a wuss when it comes to crim,e drama tv shows..especially cold case.   before we moved in with grandma I would watch cold case and cry my ass off knowing that mom was in the other room and wouldn’t know.  Now we live with grandma and I watched cold case because I got my meds so I figured I’d be able to handle it..instead I started balling my eyes out.   

So I call granny in to watch “An awesomely good show”  then when it ended the little dead boy walked down the pier and gave the officer a smile..then dissapered and ok I’m crying again.  grandma was like..”if you can’t handle it change the channel”..instead I went on about how aweful the world is to children..and cried even more..I’m such a wuss.  poor grandma. When I cry I cry hard lol.  So end of story.

naked and ulcerated

So my dog spilled my dew, I threw up 2 energy drinks..guess my bloody bleeding ulcers don’t like those things.  I can get graphic if I may..why thank you..I will continue..

My ritz cheese thingies came up with the energy drinks.  I took a nice warm shower at my moms work..forgot that I’m bald and my head is sun burned so I ended up screaming for just a moment as the pain set in…just pain people..not a biggie.  .  so anyway, I hate barfing so I’ll have to go on a soup, water, sprite jello soft liquid diet for the sake of my fucking ulcers.

Don't look at me naked, pervert. 

The Hell Queen

Glitter glitter all around..I love glitter on my eye lids and lips…It seems to be a Fall thing only for me though. I want to give a shout out to Frank, Joe, Evan, Ben…and to my homies on the sidewalk looking for their babies mama..I feel you..

So Joe and I hung out yesterday and it was so much fun. I never get to spill my guts and he bought me a mountain dew without wanting sex afterwards lol. Then I talked to my buddy Frank about politics and Thats always fun..I like talking those things as long as nobody goes berserk. Some members of my family go nuts when you debate politics ands it’s like..hide me in a corner in the fetal position sucking my thumb..or my toe depending on whats more convenient.

I’m gonna put some links on here so you can know me a little better…all of you don’t see the dark side of the RavenLei

This is a link to my published poetry

http://poetry.com/Publications/search.asp?First=valerie&Last=grogan

Here is a link to my YouTube account, so all you haters can watch and learn from a goddess of mystical proportions…Hey..I don’t judge. Enjoy

http://www.youtube.com/user/kittyvamp1977

Here is an easy way to be an activist. check out all the things you can do online to save nature and human/animal rights…just give it a shot will ya..damn you people are hard to please *wink wink*

http://www.care2.com/

Heres my page on care2

http://my.care2.com/ravenlei

it has pics of my deaf lil puppy lestat

Ok so enjoy the trip to insanity..I dont go down alone so watch your asses. I’ll slurp you in like a frog catches flies..and take you to the portals of a hellish pergatorious plight.

Hope it sticks

Well, My mom and I created a crossword so I’m going to try and upload it so you can play it.  I went to the wake last night, and my uncle totally ignored me.  and when he looked my way he acted like I wasn’t even there.  I have a word for people like that..it rhymes with “wussy” .  I’m cooking shrimp fettuccini alfredo.   

Just Ranting

The lady nextg door died and I can see the grim grieving wall surrounding that house.  It’s weird somtimes, and hard to deal witrh when your an empath.  I have to push the bad energy away to cope.  I’m learning how to do that slowly but surly for mental survival.

 

My Freinds are awesome.  Shout out to Frank, Ben and Evan.  Evan I tried calling but no answer, I’m trying to get your work schedule down lol.

I ran a bunch of errands today with my grandma.  I need to check my email.

Withdrawal and Happy Endings

I went to see a cherished neighbor of my grandmas.  Her best freind.  She has 2-3 days left and is on Hospice care.  The sight of death once sent me to a mental ward, but as soon as I got upset this time, I went numb.  I dissociated from it and now I can’t cry, which is tough.   This woman was one of the finest people on earth.  I cried a little bit thinking of her meeting my grandpa once she passes on.  I also cry about death because sometimes it feels like death would be a better place than this grimy poisoned earth.  I believe in the here-after tho so going to Gods Mansion sounds nice.  I hate being on meds and not being naturally happy and calm without being tired as hell.  If it weren’t for my family and friends I would will myself to die just to ease this pain and sickness.  I’m tired of running out of meds and ending up institutionalized because of withdrawal. What a sad entry this has turned out to be.  I’m sure I’ll see light later on.  I’ll call my friend Frank, he cracks me up. Here is a Picture of my Grandpa. I  sure did love him .                                                                                                                                                          

Ghosts & The Crazy House

I also

First I’d like to give a shout out to Frank, Evan, and Ben.  *SHOUT*  WOOHOO!!!   I just had a huge energy drink and am feeling like I’m going to climb the walls.  it’s cold outside but I want to go to a cemetery and take pics.  I usually use them in my art…and hey maybe I’ll catch a ghost.  That's scary tho.   You have to be careful at cemeteries because you can bring something home with you.  I’m used to ghosts though.  My old house had ghosts.  I lived 23 years with nothing but ghost activity so I know how to handle them.  I communicate with them.  which is also a scary thing because you can become possessed…then you’d need someone to exercise it from you. Oh the pleasures of something we don't understand.  Sticks and stones sculls and bones.  Freaky man.  Well I am wanting to shave my head again, but my hair is black and my face is pale so it kinda looks cool…if I can hide the balding spots of torment. I had cancer and it screwed my hair up, so now its thin and fuckedup. And I’d get my lip and eyebrow pierced again. but if I have to go to the crazy house, they make you take off all jewelry and it made my piercings close up again.  ok this is a pic of my old lip ring. You’ll see why I like it so much.  I also Like having the 3rd eyes Here is a pic of my 3rd eye also.Ok I’m way too hyper, later!